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The Times
  • Dennis Volkert: All you need to know about SBXLVI, and less

  • It almost no challenge to poke fun at the Super Bowl.

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  • The groundhog saw his shadow Thursday.
    You know what that means: six more weeks of football!
    I’m exaggerating a little.
    Only one game remains in this gridiron season — the Super Bowl, that pinnacle of NFL achievement, annually matches the best team in one conference with the last-in wild card squad from the other. This year’s game, the XLVIth event, is set to begin today roughly seven hours after the start of the pregame run-up.
    It’s almost no challenge to poke fun at the Super Bowl.
    Almost.
    Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a blast, it’s just more difficult to find a fresh approach.
    Almost.
    This year’s big game matches the New England Patriots, aka The 49ers of the ‘00s, with the N.Y.?Giants, the team everyone assumed was worse than the Cowboys until late November, when Dallas again decided, as a franchise, to play down to non-expectations.
    Many viewers don’t tune in for the sports action. Millions just want to see the commercials and halftime entertainment.
    For still others, those things don’t matter, either. Some people throw Super Bowl parties but pay little attention to the TV.
    Their task is to help TV viewers around the globe eat 28 million pounds of potato chips.
    We all need goals in life.
    That’s the advantage of Super Bowl Sunday:?Something for everyone.
    But suppose you’re among people who have little interest in football, advertising, music and food, yet still don’t want to feel left out?
    Well, there are things you can do to pretend you belong. It may bring little joy, but at least you can fool everyone else.
    How? By spouting trivia, of course. It’s the great neutralizer. People will love you for it.
    In the past, this would be the point when I provide trivial fodder, but anyone can find that online. Why compete with machines?
    We all need goals in life. Something for everyone.
    I’m exaggerating a little.
    Almost.
    Dennis Volkert is features editor at the Sturgis Journal. Contact him at volkert@sturgisjournal.com

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